Saturday, July 9, 2011

What do you think it Means?

I don't know if anyone wondered about the flowers posted at the top of the blog, but if you did, let me tell you about them.

Dave, for our anniversary, decided to get me living flowers instead of cut flowers. It was a nice gesture, signaling how our marriage is a living one that will last beyond the days of cut flowers or the days of nice romance, young love, and high ideals. The unfortunate problem with these flowers is I killed them. Now, I didn't do this on purpose, believe me. I tried to save these flowers. They were beautiful with buds coming out on them. I watered them regularly, possibly too much, and the buds started dying before they bloomed and then the leaves started falling off and so on and so forth. In a last desperate effort to save them, I trimmed off all the dead stuff, but it didn't help. So now my once beautiful azalea is sitting outside in the back of our flower bed, where I am hoping against hope it is only hibernating. Basically, in short, I am living in denial that it is really dead.

So coming back to the title of this post: what does it mean? My husband buys me flowers to signify our living marriage and I kill the flowers. Am I also killing our marriage? Now, I think Dave and I have a good thing going: we have our struggles, wait let me rephrase that. I have my struggles and issues and he is patient and perseverant (is that a word?). But on the serious side, do I sometimes allow MY wants and wishes to get in the place of HIS needs and desires or OUR best interests and in that way am I breaking out the foundation that a marriage needs to be built on. I know I can get rather involved in my agenda and get a little annoyed if I have to stop what I want to do to go make supper or do something for him? That is just not the Proverbs 31 woman is it?

Now I like to think to myself that when I am not working 25-35 hours a week, that then I will have more time and will just love to make beautiful meals and fancy dinners and will drop everything at the beck and call of my husband and will exemplify a servant wife. That whole sentence makes me chuckle, because if I can 't do it now, why will I do it then and I know myself well enough to know that I am not the door mat that sentence may have sounded like. That's just part of the issues at times with other people--I tend to be too opinionated.

But it is a thought provoking question: (what is the question, you wonder) What am I subconsciously doing to help or hinder our marriage? It has been a challenge for me to be willing to drop my agenda and just go spend time with Dave. I have been trying to improve on this. With him working almost every evening from 6-11, I have to take the time during the day when I am home or we will be like two ships in the night, totally missing each other and not even knowing it: at least not right away.

Wow, I didn't even know where I was going with all that, when I first started this post. Just some rambly thoughts in my head. I think that if I plan to improve domestic happiness and good will then I will get off the computer and go clean up the kitchen and get ready to go. Our church has their annual campout this weekend and we are one of the ones in charge. While we are not staying overnight, we do plan to leave at noon to go for the ball game and will be there until late, then back in time for breakfast. The campground is about an hour away, I think. I am trying to come up with all the reasons I can as to why I should not play ball. I normally do play ball, but I have not felt like playing ball all week and still don't and don't feel like I need to, but yet feel like I should. Don't even try to figure it out.

Sometime I will have to come back and add a Number 11 to my last post. More details later, but it will be on where the respectable place is to have a baby. Oh and I do have a pic of a strawberry pie to post sometime as well. Ahh the utter delicacies of a strawberry pie. Do cinnamon rolls count as pie? I made them in a pie pan and they were utterly deliciousness. I know that was not a grammatically correct sentence, but it wasn't the only bad sentence structured sentence in this article, so it doesn't feel lonely.

Good day,

1 comment:

  1. I like your ramblings. =) I also think that if I had more time it would be easier to serve my husband in the way I feel God wants me to. You shattered that bubble. hee hee Cinnamon rolls in a pie pan count. Absolutely. I made strawberry pie this week. But don't tell Mom. I want her to still think that she needs to make us one. =) Have a lovely day, and tell them I said you don't need to play ball.


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